How about another tune . . .

I hate you, you hate me,
We’re a disfunctional family.
Then a shot rang out and Barney hit the floor,
No more freaking dinosaur.

Here is my entry for random link of the day.

What goes “click click, Is that it?, click click, Is that it?”

Steveie Wonder doing a rubik’s cube

MBirch is keeping the Mrs. and I in a constant state of laughter.

Hey, it’s Friday night at the BHT. I believe it’s time to sing. Everyone join in once you have the words down. Ready . . .

DOUGH… the stuff that buys me beer
RAY….. the guy that sells me beer
ME…... the one who drinks the beer
FAR….. a long run to get beer
SO…... I’ll have another beer
LA…... I’ll have another beer
TEA….. no thanks, I’m drinking beer
That will bring us back to DOUGH

Well, someone sent my Calvin is Cool article to the President of a Baptist College in our state. A guy who knows me and was on my ordaining council. And a school that recently put out a faculty member for believing guess what? I was not happy about this forward, as it will surely be sent to my boss who will be none to happy. Of course, I also welcome the opportunity to have a chance to speak up for what I believe and to say that there is no incompatibility between our Baptist confessions and the beliefs of men like Spurgeon and MacArthur and Piper. So I did break a sweat when I heard this, but RIGNEY CAN GET ME A JOB so I’m not worried.

I just sent this out:

Nuge!!

I don’t know if you have been following or paying attention to the events of the last few weeks, however, here in TN, they seem to be caught up completely with the people’s fight against the government and their “need” to steal our money via a brand new state income tax. The long and the short of it is that many of the high ranking officials in our state government are attempting to manipulate our system to push through an income tax that is unconstitutional (as determined by the state supreme court…3 times) and unwanted by the people. For the last two weeks we have had to show up and protest any potential vote on the subject. On one occasion, the speaker of the house called for a vote and got it. 53 opposed and 45 for. These were not the results that he wanted, so he refused to close the vote until he either got some of the no votes to switch to yes or some of the no votes switched to abstain. He got the later of the two options. So, the topic is still free to be reintroduced upon his feeling that he has the votes to pass. Once again, we the people are subject to his manipulation of our system.

I am writing to you to ask for help. We need someone big to help us make a huge sound for freedom. We need someone who’s fans love freedom and are as willing to rabidly defend it as is the artist helping to spread the word. You are that man. I know of no one else that could provoke such a response from the community. I can only imagine the fear and trepidation that the sound of your mighty Gibson would generate as its powerful voice went screaming into the chambers of our legislature.

I hope that you can help.

I personally need the Alarm Fork.

Hey! New feature for the BHT (pending sen’ior moderator’s approval, of course): Random link of the day. Here’s my entry.

SS: I don’t know of any direct relation to those associated with your clan, so I’ll have to say no. ;-) Nice Axe!

Schaper: Ted Nugent Has something for you…..
I get this picture of you looking like Azreal Abyss on Goth Talk. “Steve, How are you today?....FORLORN?”

Rig…You wanted people to bite on poop! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Posted 11:33 AM by Mike Birch
Michael: A COUNTRY song about A FATHER’S EXPERIENCES WITH HIS DAUGHTER . . . hmmmmm? So many innuendoes . . so little time :)
ทAs long as the song wasn’t by David Allan Coe, everything is okay!
Posted 11:20 AM by Mike Birch
Hey, Angus. . .this one is for you, buuuuuuuuuuudy
ทEs No True! The Seep aren’t bothered at all. ;)

Hey Eric – You said she likes the smell of manure… How did she like “Glitter”?

Man, no one’s going to bite on the sentimental thing?? How provocative do i need to be? I suppose it doesn’t count because it’s not an obscure theological hair to split. Bart, pass me the Guiness—and not a measly shot glass full this time!

ScottW: All three bands will be playing the BHT this summer. Free to members.

Group: Here is the sort of thing that gives me a headache. Liberal Southern Baptist Church historian Walter Shurden- one of the first SBTS faculty members to head to the new liberal SB denomination and seminary- gives his wisdom on Calvinism. Where can I start?

“Many Baptist young people raised on John 3:16, are turning to strict Calvinism,” Calvinists have to choose between Calvinism and John 3:16? Sir, if you believe this, you are far too ignorant to talk about Calvinism. Please produce someone who has been wrestling about whether to believe John 3:16 or Calvinism, and I will show you someone who understand neither.
“Calvinists differ from other Baptists primarily on two related points of doctrine. Calvinists teach that before the foundation of the world God chose certain people for salvation, thereby assigning others to damnation by default.” Hmmm, well I thought everyone believed that God chose people before the foundation of the world, Walt. I thought the problem was who chose whom first and why. Not election itself. We all believe in that. Damnation by default?? How about Romans 3:23/6:23a. How about all are lost, guilt and under the righteous judgment of God apart from Jesus Christ. One more attempt to say Calvinists don’t believe in anything but election. tsk tsk.
Let me quote you again: “Calvinism further teaches that God’s grace is so irresistible to the elect that it is not possible for them to die without first professing faith in Christ.” Do you believe it is possible for the elect to die without professing faith in Christ? Please Walt, explain that one further.
“Southern Baptist Calvinists now hold their own annual theological conference, called the Founders Conference.” Yes- for 20 years now. But if you think that’s where Calvinism began among Baptists I think youir career teaching church history was ill chosen.
“Did God use divine sovereignty to “elect” some to salvation, while passing others by? Or did God use divine sovereignty to give all people freedom to respond to the gospel?” Close to an accurate statement, though you act as if “elect” is a word we invented. Its CALVINISM and ARMINIANISM. Salvation guranteed or salvation made possible. We are one, you are the other. Neither is a disease. One matches more texts than the other.
“Historically, a non-Calvinist approach to faith appeared first in Baptist life, Shurden said. Over time, Calvinism became a prominent part of the Baptist tradition, but strict Calvinism never has owned the Baptist field to itself or constituted the major tradition of Baptist life.” Exactly and completely backward. From the inception of Baptist life in America until the second great awakening, Calvinism owned the field and you know it sir. If not, read Nettles. By His Grace…
“The vast majority of Baptists today are not strict Calvinists,” Shurden said.” Right. They are strict Arminian gnostics who believe their own strange version of the fifth point in TULIP. Once you walk an aisle you can never go to hell.
And finally, the epitome of hogwash: “Shurden described Calvin as a “great man,” but said many of his followers have taken his teaching to extremes. In some extremes in Baptist history, Shurden said, Calvinism has generated an anti-missions and anti-evangelism spirit on the grounds that God has already chosen or “elected” those who will have salvation.” Like John Piper, and James Kennedy. Of course, the truth is that Calvinism was the genesis of the modern missions movement and you are not describing Calvinism at all, but hyper Calvinism, a theological system you refuse to acknowledge even exists separate from mainstream, evangelistic, missions oriented Calvinism. Why not go ahead and say today’s evangelistic, missions loving Calvinists aren’t really acting like Calvinists.

Ron H: Too much coolness indeed. Unfortunately, the tour will come nowhere near me. It’s doubly disappointing since I’ve missed KX every time they’ve been around since 97. I may have to take vacation next time.

“throstle,” “roriferous,” “tiralee,” “objicient” “icteric” “pugilist” “badigeon” “verticil” “kakemono” “caulicolous” “stultiloquence” “culgee” “hermeneutics” “soavemente” “toreuti,” and the winner was “prospicience”: Words in the final few rounds of the National Spelling Bee yesterday.

MatthewJ: What does she smell like?

MikeB: You are not doing anything to stamp out stereotypes of Eastern Ky. ;-) Is there a bouncer who will take Mr. Birch outside and give him a thrashing?

Eric: A LEGAL TOTALLY NORMAL RELATIONSHIP WITH A DAUGHTER.

Michael: A COUNTRY song about A FATHER’S EXPERIENCES WITH HIS DAUGHTER . . . hmmmmm? So many innuendoes . . so little time :-)

Hey, Angus. . .this one is for you, buuuuuuuuuuudy

I have a friend who likes the smell a skunk emits right after being run over on a back road in Jessamine County. He also likes that gasoline smell on his fingers after he puts gas in his car. He’s getting married tomorrow to a woman six years older than him.

Professor: Are you claiming to be impervious to a country sentimental ballad that might, let’s say, remind you enormously of your daughter or a father’s experiences with a daughter? ;-)

Good morning, everyone.
On sentimentality: I suppose it is subjective, but I think it’s subjective in the same way that how we respond to the smell of poop is subjective. Believe it or not, I know a normal, well-adjusted community pillar (you know the person, too, Michael) who says she likes the smell of manure. Not just tolerates—likes. Now I respect her right to like the smell of poop, and yes, it is subjective, but I do not share the proclivity.
And no, I have not seen Mariah Carrey’s poop, aka Glitter.
Bart, sometimes I believe we share a brain (I’m not sure who’s got it which day, though). I agree totally with your list of Cher et al. Keep up the good work.

Rob: I think artists with a vision for the CHURCH will find a home in CCM somewhere. But artists with a vision for the culture need to abandon CCM entirely and simply be MUSICIANS who happen to be Christians. If God can make Joseph gov of Egypt, he can make U2 the most popular band in the world.

Let’s see. I have 50% non Christians (200 at least). I have Pentecostals, RCs, every denomination and every style preference from quartets to Christian Death metal. I have Buddhists, Muslims, Atheists, JWs, Mormons, Wiccans and New Agers. What should be my worship style?

A front page piece in our state denomination propagnada sheet, the Western Recorder, (a paper I almost sued once) on the worship wars. I disagree with lots of it. They still haven’t discovered the web, so I can’t show it to you. If I don’t say something about it, I will write yet another article on worship and three has already gotten me exiled from my home church unless I disguise myself as Mcfarland’s mother.

First, this Paul Basden ghettoizes worship into six styles: formal/liturgical, traditional/hymn-based, contemporary music driven, ancient-modern, charismatic, and emerging post-modern. What can I say? All of these are formal/liturgical in some fashion. Very traditional worship can be thoroughly postmodern if you know what you are talking about and not throwing around anything in an A&F shirt as “post modern.” Charismatic is a worship style? That’s interesting because I thought you could find pentecostal/charismatics in all these worship styles. (You can around here.) If his point is there have always ben various styles, that’s fine. Worship reflects cultures and subcultures and presuppositions. There are many many more styles than this, particularly if you care to leave the white suburbs where evangelical experts dwell. Worship style and approach grows out of an interaction between an understanding of God, and understanding of the Bible and the culture in which this occurs. Mr. Basden has just added an example. American evangelical expert multiple choice worship.

Another strange claim: The Bible teaches multiple worship styles. There was a Jerusalem style, a Corinth style, and an Asia Minor style. This is attempting to read multiple choice into the Bible. Do better. The Gospel went to many cultures. The same truth, same God, same Gospel. Each worshipped out of their culture. The Corinthians made a mess of it. (Insert a hundred errors and excesses here.) That is a style?? What Basden is doing is teaching RELATIVISM. He is another evangelical who does not believe the Bible teaches absolutes on worship. On moral issues yes, on worship no. This is a tragic and terrible mistake evangelicals keep making. All worship from Tokyo to New York to Nashville to OBI is judged by the word of God. Yeah the music and the clothes and the length of the service and the kind of communication all reflect culture and history, etc etc etc. But all those things are judged by the Word of God and the God of the Word. Including music. Including the elements of the service. Some he has nothing to say about. Some he has a some very clear things to say about, if anyone is listening.

Last, a quote “Culture is changing, and the church must change in response. This is the incarnational principle of Jesus Christ….If you and I want to reach secular people, they you and I must figure out how to communicate the good news in relevant ways.” This scares me to death. When someone talks this way, here is what I hear. Not adapting the adaptable, but changing what should not be changed. He thinks he is talking about adapting to culture. What winds up happening is changing the message and morphing the Gospel. What I am seeing “adapting to American Suburban evangelical culture” is a wholesale sell off of the Gospel. This is more “the audience is sovereign” marketing Barna garbage. The issue of cultural relavance is addressed in the Gospel itself and its truth about who God is, who we are, what God has said and done, etc. God and his Word and his Gospel are relavant. Cultural adaptation should be simplification and speaking accurately. Incarnation- how about getting crucified. Is that the route American church growth experts are advocating? What would be their advice if they were in Sudan or China or Saudi Arabia?

Post script: Again, assuming worship = evangelism. The same old same old same old.

Bart: I might need your help with the 2 lesbians with the lead pipe, but I gotta slightly disagree with you on your list. Susan Sarandon was halfway decent in “Dead Man Walking”. I do have to hang my head ever so slightly in shame as I confess to owning the DVD of “A League of Their Own” with both Rosie and Madonna. In my defense, it was for my wife…

The CCM industry left daring behind about 10 years ago. That’s when a lot of the edgier labels got folded into the mainstream labels (like Pure Metal, Intense, and Storyville), and the mainstream labels all went, well… mainstream. Would CCM release any of these today: Keith Green’s For Him Who Has Ears to Hear; Petra’s Never Say Die; Larry Norman’s Only Visiting This Planet, or Steve Taylor’s I Predict 1990?

CCM has become a very safe ghetto of inspirational posters set on a CD. Not to say that there aren’t amazing artists who are genuinely sharing their faith and using their gifts to minister to the saints (Third Day comes to mind), but, just like regular music, the vast majority is pablum.

Oh… and Ron H: Satch is indeed the man… but I’ve gotta go with Ty Tabor (King’s X) as my personal fave.

Don’t know what is wrong with the time stamp. It’s decided I live in Nashville. Three new links: Weekly Standard, MEMRI and Instapundit.

RobR: You are certainly in a position to speak to the nature of CCM more than anyone else on the blog. Let’s go back to Rigney’s comment about music needing rebellion. Do you believe that the mainstream CCM industry today has the level of risktaking it did in the late 70’s when it signed up Degarmo and Key and Rez Band?

The two John Hagee links are CRI, and PFO, both of which are solid. (Some of the info on those links pages, though true, comes from people who would view me as the antichrist.) I think it demonstrates the careful editing of these guys that Hagee can take a position that would brand any other person a raging liberal, and it’s utterly unknown to most people. Safe to say its not made its way into any tape series or major books. (Though I don’t read him and only seldom watch him.) I have some real bloodhound friends who watch him all the time and they would smell this a mile away, but nothing.) Most distressing are some quotes where Hagee says if you don’t agree with him on Israel, you are doomed for hell, Harry Potter or not.

I like Hagee, and as far as the TBN crowd goes he is top of the heap. (applause) He is a disciplined and theologically solid preacher. I knew I disagreed with his views on the end times, but obviously this is a man who is beyond correction to take such a strange and unique view and not realize he is out past the fence. Johh, come on back to the BHT and have a sandwich and we can talk about this. Two sandwiches if you want. Or three…..(applause)

The ultimate super suck film of all time, has to be (insert any film with Madonna, Cher, Rosie, Susan Sarandon, Oprah, or Barbara Strisand)…
For Angus, these movies are tantamount to actually living the Mapplethorp “Pinky” photo.

Great sentence Scott. ;-)

I guess the stripper mom sure showed them.

I guess Hagee forgot little ole Galatians 3, esp. 15-18 (RSV)
15 To give a human example, brethren: no one annuls even a man’s will, or adds to it, once it has been ratified. 16 Now the promises were made to Abraham and to his offspring. It does not say, “And to offsprings,” referring to many; but, referring to one, “And to your offspring,” which is Christ. 17 This is what I mean: the law, which came four hundred and thirty years afterward, does not annul a covenant previously ratified by God, so as to make the promise void. 18 For if the inheritance is by the law, it is no longer by promise; but God gave it to Abraham by a promise.