Michael,

Let me be among the first to recognize your complete apostasy from the Christian faith and call you to repentance and faith in Spur . . . I mean John Cal . . . I mean John Maca . . . to repentance and faith.

I think if you were actually humble enough to sign the London Baptist confession of faith and display it prominently on this sidebar, eliminate quotes and references to anyone who’s written a book after 1800 (except those who recapitulate those who’ve written books before the 1800s), grovel at the feet of the Reformed gatekeepers around the blogosphere for several months, exalt the accepted and inspired canon of theologians and pastors God created for us to exalt, and prove your loyalty by verbally offing some high church Anglican scumbags, you might be in a position to “bear fruit” (because that’s what this particular biblical phrase means, or at least it did before the revisionist liberal elites came in with their worldy philosophies), and thus be trusted enough to be re-baptized.  But until then, don’t even BOTHER trying to display the fruit of the Spirit, because we all know it’s just part of your master plan to invade Christian households and brainwash those naive believers who haven’t been previously blessed by God with a Reformed™ doctrinal heritage.

Any use of the word “Reformed” by unauthorized parties is unlawful and restricted pending the complete disclosure of which people and movements said party is against.