I’ll bite:

Baptism – Paedo
The Lord’s Supper – Open, consubstantiation
Emerging Church – Meh. Don’t really care
Young Earth Creationism – Don’t care, but if pressed, no
Cessationism – No
Abraham Lincoln – teh debbil, father of carpetbaggers
Gender Issues – Practical Egalatarian
Inspiration of the Bible – Plenary. Just kidding. Actually, I have no idea what that means. But, the Holy Spirit inspired the writers so yes.
Gay Marriage – No
Education (Home, Public, Private, None) – Don’t care
Who is TR on the BHT? – Seriously? Ellen’s the closest :-)
Sanctification – For it. Fully.
BHT Comments – I know some think we need to be reproved in the comments. I just don’t care what they think. Closed.